Ubique's Weekly

A Mutual Endeavors Publication 

Issue #11 ~ 27 October 2003

The Blurb

Some of you this week will be receiving a first glimpse sneak peek into the pages of Ubique's Weekly. Our scouts have been out and about this past month. Keeping in tune with the spirit of the holiday, we thought it might be a decent treat to hand out copies of UW to those who might discover a continued interest. So to our newest readers, this special sample edition is just the first step. Read, be entertained, and if you really enjoy what you've read then please don't hesitate to request a permanently free subscription. For more information on how to subscribe, see our Classifieds section. As much as I would like to ramble on and on, I think that it's best that we just get this party started. So let's do, shall we? Moving on.

This Just In

Headlines

The One and Then Some: Wednesday night, 'dark' Parhi tried once again to pass herself off as the 'light' Parhi. Of course it didn't work out. The elaborately skillful Shun (XShunkun) was present at the time, and though the villainess didn't recognize him he very much recognized her. A melee ensued, eventually resulting in 'dark' Parhi being captured. She did escape, however, leaving a badly burned Shun and Toho (XPriestTohoX) with a nice hole in his shoulder. Later that night, Shun used some remnants left behind by the 'dark' Parhi to summon her back. The recapture was easy. After lying in bonds bound to Shun's life-force, she made an incredible escape attempt by poisoning Shun. Her bonds loosened, but she was then beaten into submission by Ariana. 'Dark' Parhi then spent the next two days shackled in the cellar of the SMI recuperating from a concussion and a savagely injured arm, as well as many lesser injuries. 'Light' Parhi managed to interview her, revealing the reason the 'dark' Parhi is trying to kill her.

According to 'dark' Parhi's testimony, she is indeed a concordant of 'light' Parhi and has been killing her dimensional parallels for some years now. With each murdered Parhi, the 'dark' one grows stronger and more varied in her skills. Despite this, she isn't killing her way through the continua for powers sake, or reputation, or wealth. She claims she is doing it because it feels good.

Late Friday night, 'dark' Parhi escaped from bondage. None of our sources can yet say how -- though she is known to have psychic powers, magical spells, enchanted tattoos, a telepathic link to a fiendish black unicorn, and various assassin's tools secreted about her person. (She poisoned Shun with a blow dart concealed inside one of her tusks.) Now she's on the loose again, and it's not too hard to figure out where she is headed...

Hate Mail: Earlier this week a heavily armored guardsman burst angrily into the editorial office of Ubique's Weekly to hurl a brutalized and mentally reporter to the floor. Before making a further enraged departure, the officer in question is cited to have bellowed the threat, "Kindly keep your trash out of our dimension!" Without even stopping to grace our many eager reporters with an interview, the officer stormed out of the building never to be seen again. Many of our more adventurous journalists have been out on the streets attempting to locate the individual in question. There has been little success. We cannot say specifically which dimension the officer was speaking of as none of our photographers were quick enough to get a picture of him. Nor can any of our staff recall seeing any notable markings that would have distinguished that particular guardsman with any other in any of the millions of dimensions we seek information from daily. We presume this to be a major breakthrough in interdimensional correspondence, but don't take our word for it. The reporter in question has since been delivered into the care of the Rhydin Mental Health Treatment Facility, but we have as of yet to receive any word on his condition.

Mysteries Aplenty: At the Medieval Tavern this past week, a mysterious entity by the name of Kemuel (Kemuel) was seen. Our sources cannot conclude whether this entity is good or evil, angel or demon, dark or light aligned. In fact we know nothing in particular about him other than the fact that he gives off the creepy feeling of someone people out to keep an eye on. Apparently he too attempted to make a deal with the overburdened Mesteno (Bronze Mesteno). What is it with supernatural entities trying to collect souls these days?

In Other News...

Ahriman (TheAngraMaiynu): Patience has paid off and someone has lost something that he has been waiting for. He is quite pleased

Anna (AriannaRavenwood): The blue sister is tending to house and home along with her husband Galen (Galen Ravenwood) and their two year old son Brion.

Ariana (ArianaMacGyldren): The green sister has been tending to family business and the bakery most of the week. Although she did make a number of visits to the Silver Moon Inn this past week, notably an encounter with Dark Parhi (The Multifarious), which ended with Ariana victorious and Dark Parhi locked up in the SMI cellar, at least temporarily. Ariana is worried about word of a "Thief of Time," especially with the return of her daughter Elaine's nightmares. Both events could be connected, as Reynard, the God of Dreams in Ariana's pantheon, still harbors a grudge against the strain the green sister put on his daughter Sasha, the Goddess of Time.

Carmine (TaciturnMerc): Carmine was given instructions in completing the last step necessary for the rituals that he needs to perform before participating in the Dance to create his son. Every day as the sun falls (at dusk) he must drink a special tea out of a strange substance that looks like silver dust. As this substance is utterly toxic to all but Carmine he has found the ugliest cup to prepare the tea in so that Dris (BardGaIIant) will not accidentally drink from it. A cup that looks like a lumpy, ceramic lemon that has been painted a garishly bright shade of yellow. As for the concoction, Carmine has been warned that the consumption of the brew will make his body very toxic. So much so that even skin to skin contact may potentially be harmful to all those around him.

Cassiel (InvertedDarkness): After Mesteno (Bronze Mesteno) was given his curse by Gadreel (ASaintOfSinners), he offered to help soften it for Mesteno who agreed. He was also seen in the Silver Moon Inn where he shared the bread he made with the patrons. This is the most that the public has seen of the angel in quite some time.

Deputy Marshall Wynter (Rachael Wynter): The scarred law woman in black continues to investigate various crime sprees, including a long-running series of atrocities performed on children. These investigations have kept Rachael busy and therefore she hasn't ventured out in public much lately.

Dris (BardGaIIant): This past week the bard made many escapades into the various social areas of Rhydin. One of his more noteworthy adventures had him overhearing a conversation in the Medieval Tavern between Mesteno (Bronze Mesteno) and Mithril (ASaintOfSinners). A sideline witness to the incident of Mesteno selling his soul to Mithril in exchange for releasing Faye (Faye Random) of her curse had him a little befuddled. Knowing that none of this would bode well, he spent a great deal of time sulking and chitchatting with a friendly orc he met by the name of Valir (EvenLegendsFall). Though the orc might've seemed a little slow in the head, Dris found him pleasant enough to chat with until Gem (Gemethyst) wandered her way inside. Subjected to a grueling session of flirtatious torture, Dris told the elfess everything she wanted to know that he himself knew about the Mithril/Mesteno situation. The bard claims that he was very lucky to get out of there in one piece, but we all know how much he loves his version of the story.

Doctor Maranya Tatiana Valkonan (Maranya Valkonan): The good Doctor has returned from her mysterious trip out of town this past week. There's no word on where she went or why she went there.

Duncan (Duncan J Harper): We are still currently accepting applications for any interested parties adventurous enough to research one of Rhydin's most elusive creatures. Due to a considerable lack of interested parties, our news on this particular subject has been most disappointingly lacking.

Ehzoterik VonArcanum Tempestas (Ehzoterik): Even after sending over two dozen eager reporters into the chaotic realms of Limbo, we have as of yet to discover any information concerning everyone's favorite, friendly, neighborhood psychopath. Just what could she be up to?

Elaine (Elaine Aqua): The most adorable little girl in the entire Multiverse is suffering very bad dreams again, which worries her parents Ariana and Galen MacGyldren. The latest episode brought Elaine and her companion, Empress Emerald of Grayfur (EmpressGrayfur) to the Silver Moon Inn to seek out her mother for comfort.

Erasimus Greene (PersistanceTime): A strange gnomish figure with a fondness for brown tweed suits and straw hats appeared suddenly in the Keep one find day chasing a small, bright green mouse that he called a grafrodenz. In his bungled attempt to catch the thing, he accidentally aged Gem (Gemethyst) and her unborn baby by a month or so. Since that time, he has been the target of Gem's (as well as many others') ire. The fact that he is rumored to be the "Thief of Time" that was mentioned in a prophecy about the kidnap of Gem's child at some future date does not help matters much.

Faye: She Who Tends the Dead (Faye Random): Lately there have been fewer and fewer sightings of Rhydin's most well-known fae. Her latest public visit brought to her too much sorrow than she ever thought she would be capable of acknowledging. Disappointed with the progress of the newly Reconverged Mithril (ASaintOfSinners) she chased away her associates from the Silver Moon Inn one morning only to find herself facing a being she no longer could influence. A heated argument concerning Mithril's potential future lead to an eruption of spiritual energy on all fronts. Faye placed a geas on the child in hopes that he would see the error of his ways. An attempt to help him in achieving absolute unity with all of his parts. In retaliation, Gadreel placed a curse on Faye herself. Now both seem burdened with inescapable problems. While Gadreel suffers the pains of false mortality, it is rumored that Faye herself is suffering from her own powers turning against her. However, she has been refusing to answer any calls sent in need of her. As far as our sources know, she has only manifested in the material plane once since then. Only to deliver Carmine (Taciturn Merc) his final task before the two will engage in their Dance.

Foxpride Xavier Langston Pepper (Rings Twice): The mail still somehow manages to get delivered, but no one has really seen any sign of Fox since his conversation with Ehz (Ehzoterik) many weeks ago.

Fury (ReversedHaIo): No news this week.

Gem (Gemethyst): Ever the bearer of bad news. Gem has become the primary target of Kymeera's (TheDreamWarden) stalkings on the material planes of existence. After learning of the curse placed upon Faye (Faye Random), as well as the exchange Mesteno (Bronze Mesteno) made with Gadreel (ASaintOfSinners), she became determined to do anything within her power to help her friends. Much to her dismay, however, instead of being granted an ego-boost, she was awarded a severe dampening of spirits. Thanks to the ever-helpful Nightmare Keeper, Gem has become the sole bearer of memorable prophecies concerning both herself and She Who Tends the Dead. Neither of which bode well. It seems that the higher powers beyond are determined to take Gem's child away from her not long after he is born. She also learned that there is a plot against the existence of Carmine and Faye's baby. The question we assume she has been mulling over since that time is what to do about it all?

Jade (Irreverent Jade): Another of Rhydin's most elusive creatures, the Earth Master has actually been seen this week. She paid a visit to the Red Dragon Inn Keep in the company of her adopted father, Randall (Elaborate Guns). (A stormy romance has been in the air between her and the tempestuous entity known as Gadreel (ASaintOfSinners). Our sources tell us that at first there was a blossoming romance between the Mithril identity and Jade, but we have yet to confirm our suspicions.) At the Keep we are certain that Gadreel fled and later returned. Discussion between the trio degenerated into something of a shouting match between the two men with the Earth Master maintaining stony silence in between. After tolerating as much as she could stand, she left alone, presumably returning to her restaurant/place of residence. Since that time there have been no updates.

Kymeera: The Nightmare Keeper (The Dream Warden): The only one who seems to be at all pleased about the horrific events that have been transpiring would of course be the Nightmare Keeper. Shortly after the geas to curse explosion, he manifested himself into the form of an extremely ugly large dog at the Self Serve Tavern. His amusement rippled clear as day even in this glamoured form. So much so that it annoyed the woman known as Ta'as (Gloomwatch). She had it in mind to light the dog on fire. Successful, yet not. The flames left behind a replica of the hell hounds common to Resident Evil games. Completely opposite of Ta'as' intentions, Kymeera gleefully accepted this new form and decided to go reek some havoc on the Medieval Tavern. Many events spent terrorizing the locals, Kymeera has been gathering himself quite a compiled list of potential candidates for nightmaring. Thankfully since the time he recited prophecies to Gem (Gemethyst) he hasn't been seen in the material realms. Though it is to be suspected that he'll turn up again sooner rather than much, much later.

Mallora (Ma11ora): The Mistress of the Temple of Love & Ecstasy is back and doing very well. The children are all healthy and fine. This week Ubique's was permitted to print the names of the Mistress' darling children. For more information, see our Announcements below.

Matriel (Rarefied Rain): She was seen recently joining in a dance for rain by a drought stricken community. When the dance was done the rains came and she left as mysteriously as she came.

Mesteno (Bronze Mesteno): Having been informed of the curse put upon his adoptive mother Faye (Faye Random) by the demon Gadreel (ASaintOfSinners), Mesteno foolishly bargained with the demon to save her and opted to sell his soul to have it broken. This however drew some displeased reactions from those close to him and he decided to attempt to renegotiate with Gadreel. In the course of the discussion he found that the demon's prices were too high and instead agreed to another bargain, this time to prevent Gem from making any deals with Gadreel on his behalf. Again the prices were steep. 13 months of abstinence, no affection permitted towards those close to him and a touch that is poison to those that make contact. Anael softened the new curse to some degree by making contact with Sally permitted as an exception, and Cassiel (InvertedDarkness) offered his assistance by lightening it further to make touch permitted so long as skin contact were not made, but whether or not he can last 13 months without breaking the rules is difficult to say!

Mithril/Gadreel/Lusus (ASaintOfSinners): Mith has been very, very busy. He has been working on his quest to eradicate the cult of Echt as well as Echt itself. He has cursed Mesteno (Bronze Mesteno) with toxicity, making him unable to touch anyone except his lover and those immune to poison. As if that were not enough, he bought Mesteno's soul in exchange for releasing the curse that he placed on Faye (Faye Random). He has earned Gem's (Gemethyst) complete animosity. He has convinced Randall (Elaborate Guns) that he is 100% irredeemable evil and seems to try to be working on making as many people hate him as possible. He retaliated to the geas that Faye placed on him with a curse and though that pleased Kymeera (TheDreamWarden) it seems to have alienated him from all other fae. He had his gift from Faye revoked and is now vulnerable to all music once more. His final act was to seek out a friend named Terry (Terrance Tomar) who is going to help him integrate his personalities

Ophelia (EspressoBlues): She was seen speaking to a jeweler that is known for his custom pieces. Something about transcribing the notes of a song onto a simple band.

Rei (AmethystStarfall): Happily, in spite of a bit of a magical mishap, he is still as healthy as ever. Gem's unborn son has made his protests about such magics known in the form of a demand for lots, and lots of coffee loaded with an extreme amount of cream. We can only imagine how often his mother has been craving this.

Rekah (Rekah Dravina): No news this week.

Revari: The Daydream Weaver (KaleidoscopeWhim): The spirit of memories has been very busy this past week. She has been spotted on more occasions than predictable. Moving so fast, none of our reporters can seem to follow her for too long. She disappears and reappears from and to random locations all over the globe. Never stopping to grace us with an interview, we've been forced to question the populace for answers. No two stories are alike except for those that tell us what she looks like. Still mostly appearing in the guise of an Alice in Wonderland carbon copy, and still always with a teddy bear in her arms. We cannot say precisely what it is she is up to, but we do know as the spirit of memories there must be something suspicious going on. Aside from confirming facts for a handful of locals here and there, she has been mostly quiet and subject to merely watching crowds. Or so our sources say.

Robin (Robin Kalahola): No news this week.

Sal (FrameworkMemento): Strangely we have been losing information on this particular entity. In fact, none of our reporters can seem to remember who this person is. Nor do any of our records have anything to note about him or her. If we can't come up with something for next week, we'll probably just omit this name from our pages.

Suphlatus (AInfernalElement): The captain of Gadreel's (ASaintOfSinners) forces was seen at the Red Dragon Inn Keep in the form of a mangy, flea-bitten tomcat. He was sent by Gadreel to find out just exactly what Randall (Elaborate Guns) had in mind when he ambushed his master in the Keep. He did not learn a whole lot, but was more than happy to torment Randall as well as everyone else in the Keep as a side bonus.

Suriel (Thirteenthchange): The angel of death vanished without a trace for a period lasting exactly thirteen hours down to the nanosecond. What he was doing and where he had gone is something that he is not willing to discuss.

The Rev (Rev DiabIo): Despite all the potential stories concerning the Rev last week, we here at Ubique's are still 100% certain that he is 100% dead. On a side note, many of our journalists have been let go.

Troy (Troy Embry): No news this week.

Vadriel (Vadriel de Guise): Still the peaceful hermit, the ex-priest turned 26 years old on October 20th and spent the day with Cassiel (InvertedDarkness). The rest of the week was typically mundane save for the newly arrived malicious spirits invading his home and participation in the dealings with Gadreel to protect Gem. That very same afternoon, he was alerted to the presence of a suspicious trespasser at his window, who fled upon discovery after throwing a poisonous gas grenade through the glass to try and kill those gathered. Despite the attempts of those present to try and apprehend the attacker, success eluded them and only a threatening note for Gem remained. The grounds are now being carefully watched by a great many restless spirits.

Valleana (Va11eana): Valleana has made the temple ready for the Mistress' return to Rhy'Din, and welcomed her new brother and sisters into their home with open arms and many blessings.

Yoshi (KitsuneNineTails): The rumor mill has it that he traded a particularly uncertain memory of his to Revari (KaleidoscopeWhim) in exchange for a memory of a day spent drinking as much sake and eating as much sushi as he could stand. He is up to something. The question is, what?

Classifieds

Contact Rings Twice.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ubique's Weekly is a publication provided by the not-for-profit organization known as Mutual Endeavors. As a free source of literary entertainment, you as the reader have the liberty to send out copies of our publication to whomever you think might enjoy the information shared. To save yourselves the hassle of constantly forwarding what you might find amusing, feel free at any time to inform your friends and coconspirators to contact the Editor to request their very own future copies of Ubique's Weekly at no cost to them whatsoever. It's as simple as clicking this link here: This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it

Announcements

Speaking of Friday... October 31st is just around the corner! And you know what that means. That's right! In just a few short days Halloween will be sneaking up on us. Don't forget your jack-o'-lanterns, your empty sacks ready to be filled to the brim with candy, and most of all your masks! More importantly than all that, however, we would like to remind everyone to do their one good deed of the year if they haven't already. Keep an eye on all those children and help us make the world a better place by ensuring their safety. I'm sure you've all heard the horror stories and the like, so I won't overdo it. The most we here at Ubique's wish for is that everybody out there has a very Happy Halloween!

Tons of joy to spread around. This week UW was granted the honor of being the first to know and the first to print some most splendid news. The Mistress Mallora Camale of the Temple of Love & Ecstasy gave birth to a set of triplets not to long ago in her homeland of Valtash. The Goddess has finally permitted us the liberty to share with all of our readers the very good news. By order of their birth: Andrea Jolie (3 LB 8oz, 12 inches), Alexandra Juliette (3 LB 6oz, 11 inches), and Julian Alexandre (4 LB 13 inches). All three children share the last name of Camale-de Medici in honor of both parents. Congratulations to the Camale clan! Best wishes and bright futures to the happy family!

Final Thoughts

Always remember that any future Ubique's Weekly submissions are always due the Sunday before every expected delivery date. UW is issued every Monday morning to afternoon, depending on how long it takes me to put everything together and sent if off to the printers. Comments, questions, updates, additions, announcements, advertisements, etceteras are always welcome for every issue. While some may make it to the front page, there is no guarantee that all submissions will be printed. However, your thoughts are always encouraged to be shared. Just remember to send all of these aforementioned things to me at This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it no later than Sunday at midnight EST. I constantly look forward to hearing from each and every one of you. Until next time, I'll continue to be...

Keeping you informed,
--Nefarious SM
This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it
Mutual Endeavors